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February 12, 2005

Comments

Julie Desjardins

Well you are a better person than I am because if such a comment would have been posted on my blog, it would have gotten a very long, and very emotional reply. The fact that the person wasn't even brave enough to post with their name or alias makes this post even more worthless, to me at least.

Life doesn't offer the same degree of "beautifulness" to everyone, and all days are not equal. The fact that you record your ups and downs by writing them down on a public blog has very therapeutic benefits, for you, I'm sure, but for your readers as well.

There's one thing really missing in that comment: compassion.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, I really admire you for maintaining this blog, and I learn a lot from it.

neti

I dont think there is anything wrong with being self indulgent on YOUR blog. in fact considering your condition I think you need a little self indulgent, self empowerment. One of the things Ive noticed about people who have addictions, especially alcohol , is that the one thing they need more than anything is some love and a sense of empowerment. Ashtanga has done that for me, It makes you feel so good about yourself that you wouldnt want to ruin that with anything. I think the deal to never miss a practice is something you should stick to. It will work, it just might take a couple of trys but it will stick eventually. feeling good about yourself is the key.
good luck, we're all here for ya.
Neti

suzie

Russell: your Feb. 11 entry is one of your best ever. It is precisely because you struggle, because your practice is on and off, and because you fall into temptations, that you are inspiring to the rest of us. Me, anyway. Unlike other bloggers, you are not a perfect ashtanga machine and that helps those of us who struggle in the hinterlands.

The fact that you got back on the mat after the week you describe, and felt "baptized" in your sweat, will help me get back on the mat after a difficult week too.

Keep it up.

Another ashtangi lawyer.
Suzie

Natasha

I echo all the comments above, Russell. What you did took real bravery born of self love. That anonymous emailer showed his own ignorance. He is using the 12-Step principles to beat up on a brother--like the tyrants out there using the teachings of Jesus the Christ to instill self-hatred and practice domination. Your last two posts are so beautiful. Your "selfishness" is serving to uplift me and others out there. Thank you.

J

You go Russell!
Your openess reminds me of what I'm in it for ever day when I walk into the shala, roll out the mat and lift my arms over head to begin my practice w/the first Surya A.
As much as AA can be a beautiful thing and life saver for so many folks, it's that black or white mentality of the AA Nazis that always rubs me wrong. Life is so much more than just either or....
Embrace it all. PS - "Attention suck" - Like that. I'm adding that to my lexicon!

Dear Russell,

What strange, hostile remarks from the anonymous poster. His/Her comments are so very critical. Perhaps for some people, the road to sobriety is a straight line. But for many others, it's a winding path, and it's not necessarily a pretty journey. This is what you've shared with us. I am grateful for your honesty. You write about failure, as well as success. It makes me feel like less of a loser. My struggle is not with alcohol, but the deviations from my desired path are also painful. Thank you.

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